I've been saving thoughts, now it's time to deposit them.

So I sit here on my bed laptop at my finger tips wanting to spill my guts, but hold some back due to the fact that it would be too incoherent aside from jumping topics like skipping rocks. But here's to rocks on water. This week I've grown closer to my friends at church. We've grown closer as a whole. We're a small group and I like that. It seems the college kids now outnumber the youth, but there are really no more than 8 of us aside from the soon to leave youth pastor's three kids. The inner desire to serve the Lord more has come upon on me. Slowly I see how I can with what skills I have right now, though some is speculation for now.

Rewinding to "a day without shoes" on campus I walked barefoot like others in support of Toms shoes or the shoeless around the world. Talk about walking a mile in another mans shoes, or in this case the lack there of, I did. For the first time I saw with my feet. I became aware aside from my previously weak sympathy for children without shoes. The rocks, glass I tried to avoid, puddles, and mud that my feet met first foot. I felt just a glimpse of pain many do day after day going barefoot. I want to make a change for people somehow, either through bringing them shoes or showing them how to make something to protect their feet along with sharing the Gospel.

Air 1 recently had a Blood Water Mission thing of which the band Jars of Clay started a mission to drill 1000 wells in countries where people need fresh water so they don't have to be subject to disease and forgo school toting water that's still unclean. I've realized when the city messes up the water system here and it occasionally tastes like dirt I hate it. I can't stand it. Though other people walk miles upon miles just for a few gallons that you can't even see through. I see where I've been selfish and how well off I am just to be in the US. But my recognition is not enough, I need to do something more. I want to help people somehow. Not just to give them shoes and clean water, but to give them something so that they wont thirst any longer. That's the love of Jesus Christ and His powerful message. I want to serve the Lord the best I can, and I find myself at a stand still as far as these ideas go. I guess I'm to slowly build up to such the level. I'm sure there are other tasks I'm to complete or trials to go through before I come to complete fruition for the time being, but I want the next step.

Back to the youth and our mission stuff we've started this week, I got to play guitar for them. The only song I know. God of Wonders. Even then it was a bit broken, but as I sat there and played, listening to them singing praise I wondered if I were to ever become a youth pastor. Fellow teacher friend mentioned it to me a while back asking if I ever thought about it. I don't think I'm supposed to, I mean it's probably a fleeting thought, but if God wants me to do such I will. But just playing that one song as best I could makes me want to learn oh so much more so I can honor God through the strums of my guitar. Regardless if I ever become apart of some praise band and headline for Switchfoot, this idea and once goal of mine became so much more real for the first time.

I feel as if my posts are muddled and jump subjects a lot, that for some reason I should be more focused on what I write, but it's good to get it all, well that stuff at least off my chest and into virtual la la land.

Thanks God for being so holy and loving me like you do.