It's in the water...

People are getting engaged like I get bit by mosquitoes. It's been happening left and right it seems. Just tonight I see two friends from college got engaged, and it was even on the news. I'm happy for them. I go to wish someone a happy birthday on facebook later on this evening, and sure enough, she too..engaged within the past week. Just like one of my best friends Justin. This past week, him and his lovely fiancé  Angie took a limo ride around Lexington, ate dinner, and at some point he dropped the words "will you marry me" and of course she picked those words right up and put them on her finger. I admire his style by the way. He asked her father. Something I want to do as well, and will do.

Now I'm sure this probably already sounds a bit bitter of me. Me, a single 25 year old man with one year left in college. One has to think "what about me, when is my turn?" Perhaps there is some animosity in my attitude, but hopefully not much. I'm thrilled to death for all of my friends, and the new chapter in their life God is starting. I pray for them, and wish them the best on this new grand adventure they are going to undertake together, and hopefully till death do them part, and not anytime soon at that.

I believe the count I've started for friends and relatives who are about to tie the proverbial knot, who already have said their "I do's", or just got down on bended knee is up to 13 (couples) now just for this year and in the past few months just for clarification; and to show the magnitude of this situation I'm observing. It's getting out of control, and I want to hop on this bandwagon too, license in hand ready carry her through the threshold! Somebody slap me, quick.

Now please realize I'm not that eager to go running down the isle with the next woman I meet. I've got standards and principles. "A man's gotta have his principles." Talking over coffee with a good friend of mine the other day John Follman, this subject came up. He is a Christian, has a beautiful wife who is a woman of God, and four darling children. He said "she was married to Jesus before I married her," and that's what it all goes back to. I want that. And with God fully at the center of it all.

I read a book online recently, "A Guys Guide To Marrying Well". Good stuff, and Biblically sound. Intentionality is only one thing out of many it spoke of. It's up to the man to make the first move and initiate his intentions. How else is he going to be the spiritual head of the household if he can't even lead into a conversation where his feelings and intentions are expressed. A man must also guard his heart, as well as the heart of the woman involved. I'd like to think the Lord has instilled a much stronger confidence in me about all of this through this book, and from his Holy word. God probably wont grant me a burning bush and a flashing sign saying "this is her, ask her out", there is no faith in that. Paul says "we walk by faith, not by site."

This book shares a story, of which I'll paraphrase, about a man and his 88 year old grandfather who is a retired pastor. On the subject of women the grandfather points to a passage in the Bible. Proverbs 18:22 says "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord." The old gentleman points and says "Finds. It's a verb." Of course we don't want to put the cart before the horse, in this case running ahead of the Holy Spirits leading. "Only after prayer and careful consideration should we proceed." But we cannot sit around and wait for God to drop her into our lap.

The strangest thing has started to happen to me recently, I find myself wanting to play with the "youngins" of friends I have at church. Not that I was afraid of small children before and ran from them out of fear of not knowing how to interact, I would just like to attribute it the lack of resources to. I was an only child, though this has gifted me with an immense imagination. Okay, and maybe a little fear too. Last year a friend of mine told me she and some other female friends on summer project thought I'd make a wonderful father. I've heard this a few times recently as well, along with making a wonderful husband. As of right now, I feel like these are probably some of the most encouraging and delightful compliments I can receive. Of course when I do finally have the chance to put a ring on my best friends finger, and we say our "I do's" there will not be a rush to bring life into this world. We must spend time together, just us, getting to know each other more and on deeper levels of intimacy. 

But when that time does come, I will certainly look forward to adventures in the back yard, rides on my shoulders of which they are the prince or princess of the world, first days of school, art projects, trick-or-treating, camping, fishing, lots of other things as well,  and most importantly telling them about Jesus. I will be the earthly father for them I never had. I'd like to give a shout out to all the single mothers who have raised boys and girls to become men and women of God. Thanks mom, and I love you dearly. Thank you for loving me how you do, making the sacrifices you made, and sharing the love of Christ with me.

To wrap up this water glass of thoughts the realization of what a husband does, his role as the spiritual head of the household, has become more apparent to me as I read, observe, listen, think, and pray. The song "Lead Me" by Sanctus Real comes to mind, I've been hearing it a lot lately on Air1. The positive alternative. The last half of this song has become a prayer of mine. I'll share it with you.

"So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I'm called to be
Oh, Father, show me the way
To lead them
Won't You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can't
Don't want to leave them hungry for love,
Chasing things that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this our home
Lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone."



-Jason